You Can't Afford "Surprises"

Don't be one of those guys who is "caught with his pants down" when there are layoffs or the girlfriend with the wandering eye wanders into the arms of another man.
In the past couple of weeks I’ve had one friend get “surprised” by a layoff from work, a second one “surprised” by a sudden demand by his girlfriend that they move in together “or else,” and a third get “surprised” by his seven year wife announcing she wants a divorce.
Sometimes people call me a “dating guru” or “relationship expert” (I think neither – I’m just a psychiatrist and theorist in the areas of human courtship and “unification theory” of the psychologies, but that’s too complicated a description for most, so I just let it be…) they then get all bent out of shape if I know someone who knows someone who broke up or fell on hard times.

This is kind of a silly view for two reasons:
1. My friends made their own choices regardless of the principles I teach – choosing the wrong woman from day one, letting sexual attraction die off etc, and
2. I don’t control the random nuances of the world – like the economy, or specific company boards of directors.
 
What the material in all the courses at www.menspsychology.com/courses is superb at is knowing that you know that you know how things can work AT THEIR BEST, and using that as a kind of “benchmark” or “yardstick” by which to measure your dating, relationships, and personal growth.
A second thing the courses are good for is to have a reasonable estimate of HOW THINGS WILL GO IN THE FUTURE (barring sudden dramatic changes in the environment.) But even then, as they used to tell us in surgery training – “It’s not what you do. It’s what you do NEXT that counts.” Which is to say that we can’t control the world, random conditions of the environment, or very human mistakes – but we can jump on them and correct our direction toward a great result.
This is one of those special areas of life I thought we’d cover today – the big SURPRISES that come up, and which in some cases we couldn’t have seen coming no matter what we do, and in others, had we had our eyes open much earlier, we could have prevented.
My point to you is that WE CAN’T AFFORD SURPRISES if they could in fact, be prevented in the first place. And if they couldn’t have been stopped, WE CAN’T AFFORD NOT TO CAPITALIZE ON THEM.
I’ll give you the two BIG ones that you will all immediately recognize, and the key phrase that I use to sum them up is, “We Need to Talk.”
 
We Need to Talk
In our Mature Masculine Power Program, I lay out for you how it is that feeling vital as a man – really “feeling alive” – depends on just two things: your skill with women, and your progress on a “mission” for your career life. Women, and Work.
Well, many years ago I had a nastiest of bosses, and for whatever reason he took a dislike to me, calling me into his office at random times with the phrase, “We need to talk.” Each time he wouldn’t really have much specific to say – just that he “didn’t like how things were going.” It struck enough terror in my heart every time, and yet all the other administrators were giving positive feedback.
Which is why by way of sympathy, when my friend told me this week that his boss at the media company kept telling him of falling profits, that this “creeped him out” and made him worry, we conspired together to think about what he might do “if for whatever reason he were laid off.”
Lo and behold, a few days later that happened. He told me it was bad, but that “preplanning” for such a thing greatly, greatly took the edge off the shock of the surprise, and more importantly: it started his creative brain churning, to metabolize the bad into a positive new direction toward even better jobs.
 
Stop Surprises in Their Tracks
Two principles were at work here, to stop the devastating effects of SURPRISES in their tracks:
 
    •    Observing Ego – the only human skill that allows change, growth, and your first line of defense against surprises. To be awake, aware, and at the steering wheel of your life’s resources.
 
    •    The Anxiety Map – to take worry, lack of confidence, and the threat of loss that is contained in some surprises, but to channel that into the masculine skill of COURAGE. Courageous action is “doing the right thing no matter how bad it feels.” For example, in my long-ago case, I quit and moved on to a much better whole field before the nasty boss even had a chance to play with my feelings further.
 
Both of these skills are covered in BOLD in the MindOS Mastery Course on personal growth for men.
Now I told you above that “feeling like a man,” being vital, having vitality and passion for life very accurately depend on your skill with women and your progress on a career mission.
That’s the Mature Masculine Power Program, what it has to say about career development, the connection between that and women, and how to go from “boy thinking” to “man thinking” that was once called “male initiation.”
So having looked at the common SURPRISE in the career area, you can now also associate with this huge one:
The girlfriend or wife of many months or years approaches you very sternly and says, “We need to talk.”
Ouch. Enough to wither you at the knees.
The woman you’ve been dating for only two weeks, but who is shaping up to be your utter dream-woman – wild attraction, a perfect first date, stunning conversation, plans for some events, a bottle of wine, music this weekend…
…then WHAM! She texts something completely vague about “hey about this weekend, let me get back to you…”
Then the night of the date she’s late, you call, she doesn’t answer.
You call two more times with no answer.
She finally calls back to say, “Look, we need to talk…”
And it’s off. She won’t be seeing you again. You don’t know why, and even if you ask her if there’s another man in the picture (not advisable), she won’t say so with any detail anyway.
Whether it’s a date, a girlfriend or a wife in question here, this terrible SURPRISE is among the worst you could possibly hear: “We need to talk.”
Yet again, the two advantages of all our programs come into play:
They show you a model of “doing it right” to perfection when it comes to women, work, and personal growth – a yardstick by which to measure your performance.
And they help you “set things up” as perfectly as they could be IN THE FIRST PLACE. So that down the road, you don’t get any SURPRISES because you chose the right job with the right boss, and the right woman to date, make a girlfriend or wife IN THE FIRST PLACE.
 
You Can Make Things Always Go Right
We’ve even gone so far as to give you FREE bootcamp training at the first few steps of attraction with women – which then naturally lead into learning ALL the steps of courtship with a woman in the Omega Male Program.
The whole point of learning human COURTSHIP as opposed to mere ATTRACTION is that the latter is fickle, unreliable, and a situation where “any man will do” as far as the primitive, animal force in men we call “masculinity.”
This makes all the difference in the world at preventing that dreaded event above – the SUDDEN, SURPRISING “We need to talk” conversation.
When you know the instincts of a woman’s mind, her personality type, her maturity level, and the overall process of human courtship itself, you can peg her into your life based on her likely future potential, with information you’ve gathered in the first minutes to hours of
knowing her!
Then there are NO surprises when she doesn’t call. You are a King and she is a Queen for example. Or you are mature, and she is not so much. Or you get women’s instincts but she doesn’t get men’s instincts for example.
When she does whatever random thing she does, you then shrug your shoulders, say to yourself, “Yeah, I figured that,” and move on to more impactful and enjoyable activities in your life.
To get a LOCK on personality styles and matching to women, get the KWML Mastery Course.
To get a LOCK on a woman’s maturity level, ability to commit and be loyal, and fit your life for the long term, get the MindOS Mastery Program.
And to get a LOCK on ALL of human courtship, start to finish, women’s instincts, and your own, get the Omega Male Program.
I hope you’ve been enjoying the entirely FREE, Do It Yourself Dating and Attraction Bootcamp Program.
You may also have discovered that PART II reveals immediately useful systems to be more effective with women, VIA YOUR IPOD.
It’s literally your personal dating and attraction coach by audio player!
 
AND…
 
It comes with a FREE MONTH of membership in Men’s Psychology On Demand, where you can get 24/7 LIVE coaching at attraction, personal growth, and career advice.
I’ve been told that it’s so packed with information, and over 100 tracks in PART I alone, that guys are finding so practical, so effective, and so powerful that they are inviting their friends, and friends of friends to join their learning teams – often listening three times in a row to make the lessons of the IPOD Dating Coach solid.
We are after all, Men’s Psychology, and so it might not become immediately apparent that we are for every psychological aspect of a man’s life.
That means that career matters just as much as women (or slightly less to some… hint: it ought to matter just slightly MORE.)
It also means that general personal growth matters, your friendships, development, lifestyle and “mission” for your life too.
At the core, is masculinity.
For these latter aspects of your life such as career, I created the Mature Masculine Power Program for you.
DON’T BE SURPRISED AGAIN.
With these programs, we DON’T need to talk.
You will ALREADY KNOW what's likely to happen, and what to do to avoid, prevent or embrace it.