Depresculinity

Paul Dobransky MD's picture

You Can't Afford "Surprises"

Don't be one of those guys who is "caught with his pants down" when there are layoffs or the girlfriend with the wandering eye wanders into the arms of another man.
In the past couple of weeks I’ve had one friend get “surprised” by a layoff from work, a second one “surprised” by a sudden demand by his girlfriend that they move in together “or else,” and a third get “surprised” by his seven year wife announcing she wants a divorce.

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It's the age-old question of what motivates us.

One of the ways of looking at a guy who seems to have a problem with motivation is this: is he even interested in what he is trying to get motivated to do?

And if he isn't motivated, could it potentially be that what he tries to set himself about doing is wrong for him, not suited to him, won't in the end be the reward he really wants if successful, and therefore it's all for the best that he not be motivated at that item?

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Men's Psychology's picture

Overcoming the Day Job

Q: My question is about choosing a right mission and about the moral issue of leaving a company just after having been hired. Last week I started a new job that is limited to one year. I am quite good at it, and the pay is very good. However, sitting in front of the computer screen all the day , this job has no potential to masculinize me or to help me learn to be in charge of others. I am thinking about quitting the job as this year might be a waste of time.

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If there's anything that's true about recent films, it's that they are coming closer and closer to explaining the real instincts that are so different between men and women. Maybe it's only those by the director of Wedding Crashers and the writers of The Hangover. Either way, the just-released movie, The Change-up sends a single man and married man into the other's role, with disastrous, but truly enlightening consequences no matter which you are in your own life.

 

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Paul Dobransky MD's picture

Depresculinity: A New Kind of Depression in Men

You always knew there ought to be a name for it - the state of mind suffered only by men, related to women and or work... and not be fully living. I have a word to coin. One that's likely been in your life at some point, if only for a day, or a week, or a month. It blocked your ability to meet women, but not to be out and about socially. It thwarted your sense of pride in your work, but not enough to prevent you from getting out of bed every morning to take the bus to that office cubicle.

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It seems like even Soul legends and sex symbols such as D'Angelo can feel a sense of inadequacy from time to time.

This article reveals that the great savior of U.S. soul and owner of a body women drooled over is now having problems living up to his stud status.

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Many a man finds himself defensive with a woman when the transition is upon us - the change from casual to committed in love, the choice between a better job and a better woman, and that raise and promotion versus not rocking the boat of friendship with one. Here's how to stop defensiveness in its tracks...

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